I learned late in my life is money is not important, getting a love interest till your 20′s/30′s is not important. You can be happy without materialistic things but you can’t be happy without being yourself. I always wanted to do a Ph.D., studies are something which I love, which gives me inner peace. I did my master’s in biochemistry from the finest college in Mumbai for my subject. I have my own house but my family was not so financially settled, so I had to leave my dream of a Ph.D. I worked in corporate and seriously I was earning well. My 1-month salary after the end of the 10th year of corporate job is double than my college fees from 10th Std till my masters. I used to spend 30-40k a month on my makeup, costly Shopping blah blah. My life was very successful for people in society but was I happy? Nope. I understood very late that my happiness was in my dream Ph.D., so time when people are losing their job/ financially struggling that time I left my well-paid job and trying for Ph.D. I want to get into IISC/IIT/NIT. After leaving my job I understood one thing, money is not important. My life is very peaceful now when I am unemployed but doing what I like. Yes, I am financially stable and I have good savings but now I realized I can be much happier by taking a break and doing something I like than getting into a job which was toxic because I didn’t like it in the first place.
To answer your question, I will jot down things I learned late in my life.
- Whatever happens, do what you like. Success doesn’t mean to be rich but being happy is new rich. Social status doesn’t make you happy, peace of mind does.
- You don’t have to be in a toxic relationship just because your society doesn’t approve of divorce. Being in a toxic marriage or toxic job can be bad for your mental health. It’s ok to leave toxic job/ marriage, your mental health is more important than your social status.
- Your parents are not angel beings sent from heaven, accept them with their negative traits. Don’t keep high expectations just because they are your parents, they are also human beings. Be kind.
- Sex is not important. It is one of the horrible experiences if you are stuck in a toxic relationship. Give importance to love than looks or appearance.
- It’s ok to be single and happy in your 40s than ruining your mental health in a bad relationship.
- Love is about giving with receiving. It’s a two-way business, if you’re giving a lot in a relationship think twice and have a balanced relationship with equal give and take than a one-sided toxic relationship.
- Stop pleasing people, stop finding love in others. Self-love is very important, practice it.
- Forgiveness is very important in life and yes it doesn’t mean you are accepting that person’s faults it means you are clearing that clutter in your mind.
- The ego is useless but self-esteem is important, so act wisely.
- Not all women are innocent. Stop judging people by their gender.
- Multitasking is not healthy and we should complete one task at one time rather than juggling between many things at once and ruining everything.
That “Worries” are not worth even a moment of the time we spent on them! If I had known this 20 years ago, I would have spent a happier life.
We have been taught to worry about things, right from our younger days! If you are not worrying you are not considered a “responsible” person.
Once you realize that “whatever happens” does not need your control over them (except the urge to urinate or defecate, which you need to control until you get to the space reserved for it) you are the happiest person in the world!
Now I don’t even worry about the comment from people who know me “What a worry less person! Most irresponsible!”.